A play in three acts, by Jonas and Company, travelling puppeteers.

A woefully exaggerated account of the expedition to fight the snake, acted with puppets to the delight of old and young alike. Opening with an introduction of our characters, they are slowly presented as losing their humanity as they go deeper into the woods, until they finally mercilessly destroy the tragic figure of the snake.

Has received mixed reviews from critics.

“Makes me look awesome” - Raijin Sedlak

“A pile of lies, I didn't sit at the back and do nothing during the whole trip” -Rurik Rjanslaf

A speech by a member of the Order of Amethyst

[…]

And why is it that our beautiful Archipelago finds itself so afflicted with plagues and diseases? Some would have you believe that those who suffer have worshipped the wrong gods, and that only by worshipping Dolos, Tian-Jinn or the Birds will they be healed.

Ladies and gentlemen, fear no more. These baseless superstitions will not cure your maladies. The only thing that is 100% guaranteed to work is my patented “Djenuine Snaek Oile”, extracted from the essence of the dread serpent Rubicant, likely to cure most if not all diseases. Buy some now and avoid future suffering.

Numerous posters are put up about the meeting site on the Temple grounds by members of Clan Watson.

Have you seen this boy?

Billy, age 8, last seen playing near the forests near our home.

When we called him in for food he was nowhere to be found.

Please help us find him! He loves Tonga, his pet dogs and his books.

We know he wouldn't have just ran away.

If you know anything please tell us!

Clan Watson

Just before session begins an indeterminate Elder dashes onto the temple balcony, and hangs the following notice…

Dear People of the Archipelago,

This is to inform you that there has been an important change to the rules of the temple as follows:

Rule 12: Keep Off the Lawn.

Grand Temple Elder and Undertaker of Efficiencies Cecil would like it to be known that he is unhappy with the current state of his lawn. If you have trespassed upon it, or left litter upon it, he would appreciate an apology.

Litter Includes

• Large Quantities of Timber
• Equally large quantities of quarried stone
• Refugee camps
• Prisoners of War
• Fragments (it still counts as litter even if its floating above the lawn)
• Beer tents
• Drunks
• Warhorses
• Giant Snake Gods (muzzled or otherwise)
• Savage Natives
• Precious Gems
• Chopped up Pieces of Flying Fish
• Owls
• Children
• Wolves (flying or otherwise)
• Weaponry
• Virgins

The scene at the next gathering is one of industrious chaos. The lawn, prized by the elders for storms know how long, is now home to a large pile of freshly chopped timber, some hewn granite, five hungry warhorses, and a small camp of Sedlaks arguing over some parchment.

(A transcript of a conversation between Sir Jasper Londres, military strategist for the Clan Dal'Tan, currently in hiding, and Dusky Sue, singer, storyteller and all-round good-time girl.

• Jasper: I'm telling you, he works on the principle that Might is Right, and he'll crush every clan in existence if he isn't stopped. He'll bend them to his will with fire, and, of course, the sword.
• Sue: He's a great military leader who wants to use his force for good, to rid the Broken World of cruelty and evil. You're just saying that ‘cause you got all defeated and that Librarian was killing your sex badgers.
• Jasper: By what right did he slaughter my people? By none, that's what. No rules exist to say he gets to decide what happens to other except the rules he makes. He's an aggressive tyrant. Can I buy you another drink?
• Sue: No. We've both had enough. There are no rules in this world and someone had to sort out the Dal'Tan. They were vicious killers. They were sacrificing attractive young men, who are in short supply around here.
• Jasper: Oh I don't know about that…

(The rest of the conversation was not worth listening to and might stain young ears.)

• The Birds are our Gods.
• The Birds aren't our Gods.
• The Elders are filthy Bird-worshippers.
• Did you hear about the Clearsky party, were you there? That Harold William Jones knows how to throw a good shindig. Apparently there were a number of lovely ladies floating around, then that Cyrus the Wanderer put on a jolly good show, and Al's ale was the best I've ever tasted.
• Want to know what’s hot this season in the way of hats? It’s the pink Bonnet for the ladies and the wide brimmed hat for the men. Also lots of people are wearing leather of all kinds. Makes you look sleek.
• Did you see the geomancers at work? Well I hard they just saved us from raiders. That Eugene Hackworth and Derrick Greymist landed a fragment right on top of them and crushed most of them flat. Then Chylonaxis brought Augustin Volyova in with an army of Crimson Shirts to wipe up the remainder. They took prisoners, don’t you know? They're bringing them HERE!